Videos
I Drink My Whiskey Neat (I Don't Like ICE)
Russ Somers
1/18/2026
Lately it’s been looking like they’re driving us to hell
Grabbing people out of cars and they throw ‘em in a cell
That’s if they’re lucky
Don’t know what to do about it but somebody’s gotta try
Walking past the demonstration, stopped in cuz my throat was dry
Bartender said, “whatcha drinkin’”
I like a cold draft beer
Tequila shots are nice
I drink my whiskey neat
Because I don’t like ICE
You can watch it on your TV, you can stream it on your phone
When you see it with your own eyes they’ll deny it to the bone
Who you gonna trust?
Not your lyin’ eyes
Now it ain’t a revolution that I’m trying to incite
But the way I drink my whiskey is a First Amendment Right
Do what you must
See through the lies
I like a cold draft beer
Tequila shots are nice
I drink my whiskey neat
Because I don’t like ICE
I drink my whiskey neat
Because fuck ICE
© 2026 Russ Somers
The Mighty Portland Frog
Russ Somers
10/8/2025
A video was trending so they called up Kristi Noem, and
Said get up to Portland time to defend the homeland
“Everyone is laughing at me,” Leader monologued
“Go handle those protestors like you train a naughty dog”
The mighty Portland Frog
Is dancing in the night
And agents in full tactical
Shudder at the sight
We don’t need no weapons
We just want dialog
But if you want to fight, you’ll face
The mighty Portland Frog
Kristi on the rooftop, conferring with her troops
A cosplay for the cameras to get content for Fox News
Pepper balls and tear gas filled the street with acrid fog
But when the smoke had cleared, there stood the mighty Portland Frog
The mighty Portland Frog
A beacon for the free
He’s weird and he’s American
As much as you and me
So post this scary video
On your patriotic blog
Amphibian antifa,
The mighty Portland Frog
We’ve got the naked bicyclists as cavalry to ride
And if you’ve got a sense of humor you just might be on our side
Every day there comes another swarm of polliwogs
All following their leader, the mighty Portland Frog
The mighty Portland Frog
Is dancing in the night
And agents in full tactical
Shudder at the sight
The mighty Portland Frog
A beacon for the free
He’s weird and he’s American
As much as you and me
Amphibian antifa
The mighty Portland Frog
© 2026 Russ Somers